FUNDAMENTALLY SOUND

By Travis Hardin
An Inspirational Speaker @ The Re-De-Fined Project

Too often we as adults focus on obtaining a desired result and expect our youth to win or overcome.  We end up getting disappointed because they cannot deliver or make the simple decisions that are required to be competitive on the field of life. Our attention is on the end result, rather than on preparing our youth to execute during their performances. Execution starts on the practice field and only after numerous hours of proper practice and hard work will it be carried on to real life situations. 

One of the common denominators upon successful performers or athletes is 10,000 hours of practice (perfect practice). Thus, to be successful at anything, it requires hard work, dedication, determination and discipline.  
On the same token, we expect our youth to hit singles, doubles, triples, or even homeruns when facing the challenges of life. Instead of focusing on the end result, we should teach our youth to focus on executing a perfect swing and fielding a ground ball, catching a fly ball, or delivering a pitch fundamentally correct. Youth need to understand that there are things that he/she cannot control, like getting a hit. A baseball player has no control on what happens after he executes on his swing and hits a line drive. The other team might make a great play and make the out, but the important thing is that the player executed correctly and not that he did not get a hit. As it is in life, we need to encourage youth even when they fail at something after putting in the hard work to complete the task.

I have seen many instances where a player hits a hard line drive and somehow gets put out. Then goes back to the dugout with his head down or even sometimes takes his helmet off and throws it on the ground. This is mainly as a result of coaches or parents expecting their kids to get a hit, rather than expecting them to hit the ball with proper form.  Help the players focus on execution rather than results, on what they can control rather than what they cannot control.  Praise them for hitting the ball, not just when they get a hit.

Winning is a result of hard work, dedication, determination and discipline. Focus on the latter four and winning will take care of itself. This is why I don’t like to talk about winning during speeches or instructional work. We focus on what we have control of; like working hard, getting our perfect repetitions and developing mental toughness.

As I sat and watched game 3 of the World Series between the San Francisco Giants and Detroit Tigers, I could not help but to wrap this latest message into baseball terminology. The hits in the game of baseball are just like the everyday successes our youth see but are not given recognition for. We only celebrate them when it is a large accomplishment (home run). Let’s get back to basics by teaching and coaching morals and values. No matter what the score is in life, if our youth are given the proper strategies during the critical learning phase, ages 10 – 18, we will minimize their thirst to want to follow the “In Crowd.” We have all been there where we see something that really isn’t there. Love at 16 felt like it was going to be marriage and life happily ever after. Only to mature and learn that we didn’t know what love was until we endured hurts, pains, ups and downs. Just like the last out of every World Series recorded in history, win or lose, spring training will return in March. Help us to keep the basics of morals and values in our youth. Celebrate them for the work and efforts they are putting into their service. Life is not always about winning. Some of my losses have been much more valuable than the wins. I am sure you can go back in your past and think of some things or people you drifted apart from which felt like a tremendous loss at the time, only to mature and learn, you would not be where you are had you stuck around that negative thing or person. Let’s embrace the fundamentals.

What I learned from Derrick Rose

By Jody McPhearson

An Inspirational Speaker at The Re-De-Fined Project

 

                             



For those of you who have no idea who Derrick Rose is, he is best known by his job. He is the starting point guard for the Chicago Bulls. In fact he is a bona fide NBA superstar. But that is not who he is.

Here is one of my favorite quotes from Maya Angelou “The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.”

Well, Derrick Rose has shown himself to be a pretty quiet and private individual. He does not really enjoy the spotlight.

Here is a lesson learned from my mother. Adversity will reveal who a person truly is.

This past year, Derrick Rose has had to undergo a great deal of adversity during the season with nagging injuries to himself and teammates.  But that was just the beginning of his adversity. He had a season ending and career threatening injury. All in the public spotlight!

Now that brings us to the point of it all. Derrick Rose has taught and is teaching me many things while I am watching and reading about him.

During his first meeting with Adidas, his shoe sponsor, the executives from Adidas asked him what he wanted to accomplish his rookie year. Do you know what he said? He said, "I Wanna make My Mom Happy and My City Proud."  What if more professional athletes lived with this focus? What if celebrities had this in mind as they made choices? What if this was the mantra of more teens?

Maybe we can't do anything about professional athletes or celebrities, but we sure can do something about teens!

I learned from just that quote that Derrick Rose loves his mother, and his City! Chicago is a city that saw a record numbers of murders this past summer. It is also a city that had an ugly teacher's strike this summer. He loves a flawed city!
 

So, there is another lesson learned from Derrick Rose. It is okay to love someplace and someone that is not perfect. That kind of love will motivate you to help it or them get better.

Let me share with you what sparked this post. I read an ESPN article about Derrick Rose that poised this question. What can one man do about deep-seated social ills like poverty and violence? Read it here

 

If I have learned anything from Derrick Rose this summer, it is this. One man/woman/teen can do a lot! Especially if that person is willing to share their story of overcoming and persevering. I have learned that Derrick Rose has become a symbol of hope for his mother, his family, his friends, thousands of teens, and his entire community.

This summer, four groups of rival gangs, church leaders and a few NBA players got together for a game of basketball in an attempt to find a solution to the violence in the city. Derrick Rose came together with St. Sabina’s Father Michael Pfleger for the “Balling for Peace” tournament. After the tournament, every player got a job. St. Sabina partnered with businesses in the community to make sure that players were rewarded with employment for their peace pledge. Gang members traded their guns for basketballs. Some gang members were quoted as saying, “Opportunity and seeing that someone cares” are what’s needed to make a change.

I have learned that Derrick Rose is not afraid to show just how much he cares.

When presented with his new Adidas basketball shoe and the chance to talk about how special he legitimately is, Derrick Rose chose to show real human emotion and thank God and his family and the people who believe in him for their support and inspiration.
 

I have learned that Derrick Rose has an astounding work ethic, that he is humble beyond belief,(especially for a generation that most label as selfish and self-centered), and that he is fully aware that there is more to it all than just worrying about Derrick.

I know that I am usually speaking about teens, and the example that I am using is NBA superstar, Derrick Rose, but let's not forget, Derrick is only 24! He was, not so longer ago, just a teen from the very city that he now inspires. All because there were those adults, friends, and siblings who were invested in his life, that gave him hope.

Derrick thanks for the lessons! May we each take it upon ourselves to be the hope for our mothers, family, friends, teens, and our community!
 

                                    

 

 

 



THE BULLIES WHO LOST

                                      
By Travis Hardin
Inspirational Speaker at The Re-De-Fined Project

                                       
 

No matter how (un)popular you were in high school, Whitney Kropp’s story hits home.

Imagine this: she’s sitting in math class as the homecoming court is announced over the PA system. She’s surprised – and thrilled - when she hears her name in the homecoming line up.

"She's just sweet. She doesn't have a mean bone in her body," Whitney’s mom, Bernice Kropp, told The Detroit News (as reported in a wonderful article, “Town turns tables on school prank”).

But the surprise quickly turned into a nightmare: it turns out that Whitney was picked as a joke. The 16-year-old found out, via Facebook and word of mouth, that “popular” kids put her name in the running as a prank. Hysterical: an unpopular girl in the homecoming court! Right?

Wrong. But what makes this act of bullying different is that it wasn’t hushed up or ignored. Covering up incidents of bullying ostensibly protects the victim, but it can also send the message that the bullying target is somehow at fault; it also lets the bullies off the hook. But that’s not what happened in this case. Instead, Whitney’s sister told her friends, who told their parents, who told their friends, The Detroit News reported.

Word spread and people rallied around Whitney in support. Someone created a Facebook page in support of Whitney, and it has more likes than the rural Michigan town has residents. Local businesses rallied around the teen, donating her dress, shoes, jewelry, hair styling and makeup. The 16-year-old was escorted by her father and grandfather to the field, where she confidently took her place in the Ogemaw Heights High School homecoming court. Students on the opposing team cheered Kropp on with banners.

The overwhelming support is heartwarming, and the outright rejection of 1980s John Hughes-esque high school meanness is inspiring. I love how this town has turned the tables on these small-minded bullies; this kind of community support is what could finally put an end to bullying once and for all.

Do you think this could happen in your city? In order to assist against bullying efforts in your city, speak up and encourage ALL youth. It doesn’t hurt to share your stories from when you were a teenager. The time is now to be Honest, Open and Transparent.

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DO YOU KNOW THE LIFE EXPECTANCY OF A CHILD PROSTITUTE?

By Jody McPhearson

Telling Teens They Matter

 

Look at me now, look at me now      I'm getting traded
Look at me now, Look at me now     every day I have to fake it
Look at me now, Look at me now     I am a sex slave
Look at me now, Look at me now     I long for an early grave
Look at me now, Look at me now     can anyone see my face
Look at me now, Look at me now     my memory is being erased
Look at me now, Look at me now     I’m having trouble sleeping
Look at me now, Look at me now     I can always hear them creeping
Look at me now, Look at me now     I’m trapped with nowhere to run
Look at me now, Look at me now     my homecoming days are done
Look at me now, Look at me now     why can’t you hear my screams
Look at me now, Look at me now     do you not know I had dreams
Look at me now, Look at me now     because you’re so appalled by slavery
Look at me now, Look at me now     it’s ironic that you won’t even look at me

Authorities conservatively estimate there are at least 250,000 teen sex-trafficking victims in the U.S. at any one time.

"Victims of human trafficking pay a horrible price. Psychological and physical harm, including disease and stunted growth, often have permanent effects. In many cases the exploitation of trafficking victims is progressive: a child trafficked into one form of labor may be further abused in another. It is a brutal reality of the modern-day slave trade that its victims are frequently bought and sold many times over-often sold initially by family members" (Trafficking in Persons Report, U.S. Department of State, 2006).

By the way, here is the answer to the original question:

LIFE EXPECTANCY OF A CHILD PROSTITUTE .....7 YEARS

“GIVING” Begins at a young age

I was recently asked by a coworker, why I give to my community as often as I do. I thought about it for a brief moment and responded with “My today is a result of GIVING when I was younger.” I saw my father give of his time when I was young and it always had a huge impact in the lives of those he helped. The key is, teaching our youth to give when they are young.

It can be tough to teach children the value of giving in a society when they're surrounded by messages about the value of getting. Here are five ways to start:

Start small when the kids are small.

Youth might be happy to help bake cookies for a friend but end up wanting to keep the gift themselves. An exercise for a young person would be baking enough cookies to keep and enough cookies to give. Young children need help in learning to share.

Teach your child that he doesn't need money to give.

Help your child make gift certificates good for "one free car wash" or "breakfast in bed" that he can give to a family member.

Involve your child in selecting the gift.

You may think that donating to cancer research is important, but your child who is an animal lover may be more interested in making sure the dogs at the humane society have an extra treat at the holidays. Help them find a way to give the gift they feel is important.

Be a role model.

Volunteer your family's time at a soup kitchen or senior center. Gather small-size toiletries, such as toothpaste and shampoo, and pack them in gift bags to take to a homeless shelter. Ask your child if they'll help you baby-sit for a neighbor's toddler so the neighbor can do some shopping or stop and help you bring groceries in for an elderly person who has returned home from the grocery store.

Personalize giving.

It's faster for busy parents to write a check to a charity, but it has little impact on a child who can't see where the money is going or imagine the people who benefit. Delivering canned goods to a food bank is more meaningful than dropping a check in the mail. Your family could "adopt" a needy family through a community organization, choose the gifts and wrap them.

Feeling too busy to organize an activity like this? Author Ellen Sabin has suggestions that can work for the most time-challenged parents. Sabin wrote The Giving Book: Open the Door to a Lifetime of Giving, an interactive workbook to help 6- to 11-year-olds discover the joy of giving and their power to make a difference. Sabin also offers free tools and guides for parents, teachers and religious educators to use with her book.

Sabin suggests having a family conversation about what you're thankful for. That will help your child realize that what she values may be missing in other people's lives.

Sabin also offers three activities to try. "These things don't take huge amounts of time. They just take a few moments of thoughtfulness."

• Start a tradition in which family members set aside one of their gifts to give to someone less fortunate.


• Think of someone without a family - a soldier, a distant relative, a friend in the hospital - and write a letter as a family to make the person feel loved and included during the holidays.


• Talk about beginning the New Year with a family giving box. Everyone can regularly add a small amount of money to the box to contribute to a group or cause the family agrees to support.

Giving gives children a sense of self-esteem and pride, says Sabin. "Giving is addictive. It gets in your blood. It makes you realize that you and your actions matter." I challenge you to GIVE today.

 

Travis Hardin,

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