MUST A GIRL BE NAKED TO BE LOVED?

By Jody McPhearson
An Inspirational Speaker at The Re-De-Fined Project

I hope the title was not what sucked you in! You might be disappointed to find that there are no nude photos here. You really did not expect to see any did you?

Anyhow, let's get to what this blog is really about. Modesty! That's right, modesty! Saige Hatch, a California high school student started the Modesty Club recently. A club that encourages teens to dress modestly, have high self esteem, and respect their bodies. In a day and age where I constantly hear about teens dressing provocatively it is refreshing and encouraging to hear about some wanting to cover up. As it turns out, this is not the only club or organization of its kind. The Pure Fashion Mission is a faith-based program that encourages teen girls to live, act, and dress in accordance with their dignity as children of God. There are others, as well. These are just a couple of examples.

Amazingly, some teens are actually rejecting what the media says is appropriate dress for their age. What about us? The parents! What role do we play in all of this? After all, most 13 year old teens do not work, in order to purchase their own clothing. Therefore, it stands to reason that we as parents are the ones buying the clothing with words written across the butt, drawing attention to an area that I as a dad have no desire to have attention drawn to.

Should we as parents support our 15 year old sons wearing only a colored wife beater to the movies, in order to showcase the tattoos that we sign permission for them to get? Should we allow our 14 year old daughters to buy lacy bras that peek out at young men when the extra low cut v-neck t-shirt that are wearing moves around while they are playing dodgeball? Or thong underwear that shows when they bend over to tie their shoes, while wearing their skinny jeans? By the way, these are not magic jeans, they do not make the wearer magically skinny. But I digress. By now, you get the point!

The media, entertainment industry, fashion industry, and music industry all tell our teens that the less clothing you wear, the more attractive you are. The more people love you. Well, isn't it time that we, as parents, say differently? Perhaps today, you can look at your teen and tell them that they do not have to be naked to be loved. (Of course, if you bought that inappropriate outfit, it could be an awkward conversation!)

Let us first decide that this is not acceptable, and then, let us empower our teens to decide the same.

Photo Courtesy of www.purefashion.com

What I learned from Derrick Rose

By Jody McPhearson

An Inspirational Speaker at The Re-De-Fined Project

 

                             



For those of you who have no idea who Derrick Rose is, he is best known by his job. He is the starting point guard for the Chicago Bulls. In fact he is a bona fide NBA superstar. But that is not who he is.

Here is one of my favorite quotes from Maya Angelou “The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.”

Well, Derrick Rose has shown himself to be a pretty quiet and private individual. He does not really enjoy the spotlight.

Here is a lesson learned from my mother. Adversity will reveal who a person truly is.

This past year, Derrick Rose has had to undergo a great deal of adversity during the season with nagging injuries to himself and teammates.  But that was just the beginning of his adversity. He had a season ending and career threatening injury. All in the public spotlight!

Now that brings us to the point of it all. Derrick Rose has taught and is teaching me many things while I am watching and reading about him.

During his first meeting with Adidas, his shoe sponsor, the executives from Adidas asked him what he wanted to accomplish his rookie year. Do you know what he said? He said, "I Wanna make My Mom Happy and My City Proud."  What if more professional athletes lived with this focus? What if celebrities had this in mind as they made choices? What if this was the mantra of more teens?

Maybe we can't do anything about professional athletes or celebrities, but we sure can do something about teens!

I learned from just that quote that Derrick Rose loves his mother, and his City! Chicago is a city that saw a record numbers of murders this past summer. It is also a city that had an ugly teacher's strike this summer. He loves a flawed city!
 

So, there is another lesson learned from Derrick Rose. It is okay to love someplace and someone that is not perfect. That kind of love will motivate you to help it or them get better.

Let me share with you what sparked this post. I read an ESPN article about Derrick Rose that poised this question. What can one man do about deep-seated social ills like poverty and violence? Read it here

 

If I have learned anything from Derrick Rose this summer, it is this. One man/woman/teen can do a lot! Especially if that person is willing to share their story of overcoming and persevering. I have learned that Derrick Rose has become a symbol of hope for his mother, his family, his friends, thousands of teens, and his entire community.

This summer, four groups of rival gangs, church leaders and a few NBA players got together for a game of basketball in an attempt to find a solution to the violence in the city. Derrick Rose came together with St. Sabina’s Father Michael Pfleger for the “Balling for Peace” tournament. After the tournament, every player got a job. St. Sabina partnered with businesses in the community to make sure that players were rewarded with employment for their peace pledge. Gang members traded their guns for basketballs. Some gang members were quoted as saying, “Opportunity and seeing that someone cares” are what’s needed to make a change.

I have learned that Derrick Rose is not afraid to show just how much he cares.

When presented with his new Adidas basketball shoe and the chance to talk about how special he legitimately is, Derrick Rose chose to show real human emotion and thank God and his family and the people who believe in him for their support and inspiration.
 

I have learned that Derrick Rose has an astounding work ethic, that he is humble beyond belief,(especially for a generation that most label as selfish and self-centered), and that he is fully aware that there is more to it all than just worrying about Derrick.

I know that I am usually speaking about teens, and the example that I am using is NBA superstar, Derrick Rose, but let's not forget, Derrick is only 24! He was, not so longer ago, just a teen from the very city that he now inspires. All because there were those adults, friends, and siblings who were invested in his life, that gave him hope.

Derrick thanks for the lessons! May we each take it upon ourselves to be the hope for our mothers, family, friends, teens, and our community!