It was a 112 degree day in June of this year (2012). I was on my way to grab lunch when I decided to go inside a downtown Phoenix restaurant for a meal. I was in no rush as the sweltering heat was keeping the pace of everyone to a crawl. My thought was “This will be quick as there are no lines in any of the restaurants and not many people walking around downtown because of the heat.”
I approached the counter of the restaurant to place my order and had been looking up at the menu for 30-45 seconds when I looked down to see a young man standing next to me with his pants hanging halfway down his legs. I thought to myself, “He needs a belt, this is a little much.” Only to observe he had a belt on.
I then thought, “I will leave it alone because if I say something, he may take it the wrong way and react like a typical teenager.” When I say typical, I mean disrespectfully reply to my question regardless of how polite I speak to him. All of this going on in my head and the young man was simply preparing to place his order just as I was.
I looked down again and realized I had to say something no matter the outcome because there were people all over the restaurant staring and making comments regarding the young man’s pants. I had the worst outcome made up in my mind before speaking. It ran across my mind, “If this young man takes a swing at me I will have to physically respond to his threat against me.”
I said hello to the young man and he responded with a very polite “How are you sir.” I acknowledged with a smile and said I am fine but was wondering why in the world he was showing me his rear end below the shirt.
He responded with a child-like laugh and told me it was just the way his pants fit. I told him how much of a distraction it was as people were trying to eat and his pants were noticeably hanging too low below his waist. He smiled and said immediately “I will pull them up and tighten my belt.” He then went on to thank me for respecting him and asking nicely for him to pull his pants up…… WOW! Not the outcome I had in mind
I thought to myself, “That’s it! All I had to do was politely ask for him to pull up his pants?” I had already played multiple scenarios in my head as to the outcome of asking him to pull up his pants and he nicely pulled them up without hesitation.
How often do you refrain from speaking to our younger generation for fear of their disrespectful response? All it took was for me to SAY SOMETHING. I actually sat down and had lunch with the young man and he shared with me his thoughts and ideas about his future. He wanted to go to college. He had dreams of a family. He aspired to be the best father he could be once he was ready to have kids….. And I had in my mind we would be fighting in the restaurant. Boy did this young man bless me on this day.
I ask you to simply take the time to STAND UP and SAY SOMETHING the next time you are in this position. You may be able to destroy some personal stereotypes you have of our younger generation and be blessed like I was. There are some disrespectful youth and adults out there but if we give respect, it typically comes back in return.
Travis - I thank you for putting it on paper what I have been thinking for many years. I often think the exact same way and I never choose to say anything out of fear. This blog will help me to change my actions towards our youth. Afterall, they are tomorrows leaders.
ReplyDeleteThey are tomorrow's leaders! We want to encourage them, not discourage them. Thanks for the feedback.
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